How to Break a Bad Habit

“It doesn’t matter how successful or unsuccessful you are right now. What matters is whether your habits are putting you on the path toward success. You should be far more concerned with your current trajectory than with your current results.” – James Clear, author of Atomic Habits

 As I was going through my weekly review with my coach this week, I noticed something strange. I had no major victories to report, but I had a successful week. Despite no major victories, when I looked back on the week, I felt good. I could tell I was making progress.

How? I use the momentum indicator to track my habits. Every day I do a habit, I get a +1, every day I don’t do a habit I get a -1. Sometimes I give myself half-points for “good efforts.”

I still ate sweets last week and I even binged on diet drinks one day. But I won more days than I lost. My momentum indicators increased. As those numbers get higher, I know my brain is producing myelin along the neural pathways surrounding those habits.

As those numbers increase my brain is changing and taking the right action will become easier and easier. Sooner or later (if I don’t quit) these good behaviors will become automatic and part of who I am. Then I can focus my willpower on the next habit I need to create.

That is what I get out of James Clear’s quote. Trust the process. Do the work every day and the outcomes will come.

Most of us have a few habits that are not producing the outcomes we want for our lives. Eating too much junk food, watching too much TV, smoking, etc. Fixing a bad habit requires a different plan than creating a new one.

Let me show you how the process works, and we’ll use my “eating too many sweets” habit as an example. Here are the steps:

1 – Identify the Habit You Want to Replace

When you look at a habit holistically you never stop a bad habit, you replace it with a better one. This is because that habit is providing you with some sort of reward and you need that reward. We must find a better path. The habit I’d like to replace is – “eating too many sweets.” Never work on replacing more than two habits at one time. Focus is required. Willpower is a limited resource.

2 – Visualize the Win and the Loss

Great athletes visualize their ultimate performances far more often than they physically perform them. Science shows that practicing something in your mind builds up the same neural pathways as performing the action. And, performing perfectly is a lot easier in our heads! So, visualize your life with your new habit. Then, visualize your life if you stick with your current habit.

If I stick with my “eating too many sweets” habit I am not going to be in the physical shape I want to be in. My mental and physical condition will be worse than it could be. I will have less productive years on this earth. I’ll have less time with my family and less energy to enjoy them. Is all that worth the extra donut?

On the positive side, what will happen if I replace my sugar habit with a better one? I will have a longer productive life. I’ll be mentally sharper and fitter physically. I’ll be more confident. I’ll look better. My clothes will fit better. I’ll even earn more money for my family. Fit people have more energy and longer productive lives. It would be difficult not to make more money. I’ll be a better example for my children. I will be following the biblical mandate in 1 Corinthians 6:12 to “not be enslaved by anything.”

As you can see, eating more healthy foods and less junk will be a “keystone” habit for me. I will be able to build many more healthy habits on the foundation of this one!

3 – Determine the Cue

When and where does this habit happen? Think about the place, time and feelings you have when you do this habit. Knowing everything about this negative habit loop will be key as you fight to replace it. For me, my sugar habit generally occurs late at night and after dinner.

4 – Experiment with Rewards

What rewards does your current habit give you? Is there a better way to get those rewards? Eating sugar lights up the pleasure centers in our brains. For people with sugar eating issues, this dopamine hit makes us want more sugar. When we finally stop eating the sugar, our sugar high fades and we go into self-criticism mode. Then we think, wouldn’t a candy bar make me feel better? Obviously, not a good cycle! What are better ways to light up the pleasure centers of our brains? This is where you experiment to find what rewards work for you.

5 – Make a Plan

You’ve figured out where, when and why this habit occurs. What are you going to do when temptation strikes? Brush your teeth, do push-ups, anything but indulging in the habit. Now, set a timer for 15 minutes. Ask Siri & she’ll do it for you. Do anything but the negative habit during those 15 minutes. Once the 15 minutes is up, ask yourself how you feel. Pretty good? Walking out self-discipline always makes us feel better. Write down your results.

6 – Track & Celebrate

Change is hard and our brains are great at telling us the story we want to hear. Track every time you indulge in the bad habit and every time you replaced it with a good one. You’ll learn a ton. New ways to battle the habit will emerge as you learn.

Expect failure. If you aren’t failing, your goal is too small. Embrace failure and learn from it. Enlist an accountability partner. I have a coaching call every week to review my habit tracker and I enlist my family whenever possible. My oldest now reminds me to brush my teeth after dinner!

You (and I) have the power to create the habits that will lead to the life we desire. Get started. Create small wins. Build momentum. Trust the process and the outcomes will come.

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